Action Equals Reaction
by Sanjuno Shori Niko
Summary: There is a time and a place for everything. Even things like learning that your Air Commander is pregnant and his parents are wingnuts. The middle of battle is neither the time nor the place.


Title: Action Equals Reaction.

A Transformers: G1 Fanfiction

Author: Sanjuno Shori Niko

Summary: There is a time and a place for everything. This is neither the time nor the place.

Bunny: 'Megatron thought that he knew everything about his soldiers, including the fact that the command trine and Conehead trine were acquaintances prior to joining the army. What he didn't know – and found out along with the rest of the Decepticons and whole of the Autobot army – is that Skywarp and Thundercracker aren't Starscream's brothers, they're his creators.'

Notes: A rather belated Christmas giftfic for the brain twin, Katsuko, whose bunny is above.

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Megatron prided himself on being well informed. If you knew a mechs past you knew what their emotional weaknesses were, and then you knew how to control them. The Decepticon Warlord knew all about Soundwave disguising his creations as drones. He knew about Octane's confused feelings for the Autobot Wreaker Sandstorm. He knew that the Coneheads and the Elite Trine were old friends from before the war.

Knowing all this, Megatron felt assured that he had all the angles covered.

Of course, this confidence only lasted until Megatron was once again forcibly reminded that every mech working for him was certifiably insane.

The latest reminder of his wretched fate came at the beginning of yet another battle with the Autobots. Pausing along with his opponent, Megatron stared at the chaos that had overtaken what was supposed to be his core command crew.

Starscream seemed to be the central focus of the beldam, that much at least was normal. The part that gave Megatron pause was the way Soundwave appeared to be attempting to hide from Skywarp's homicidal glare. The telepath was being very careful to keep Starscream between himself and the Air Commanders wingmates. Although Thundercracker seemed to have forgotten that they were in the middle of a battle, or indeed that anyone other than Starscream existed. The blue Seeker fussed over his Trineleader, and as Megatron watched incredulously, Thundercracker squealed in obviously gleeful excitement and glommed onto Starscream. As for the Air Commander himself, Starscream seemed to be cycling through a gamut of emotions that included but were not limited to chagrined embarrassment, smug pride, stunned disbelief and incandescent joy.

Megatron decided that enough was enough. The fools had brought the entire battle to a halt with their antics. Why had he thought it a good idea to recruit Seekers again?

"Desist!" Megatron roared loud enough to rattle the debris strewn about the battlefield, as he stormed over to where his troops were making a mockery of their entire faction, "I demand an explanation for this foolishness!"

The Decepticons leapt to follow their leaders orders as usual. Which meant that the noise and confusion doubled. Again, as usual.

"Get Starscream off the battlefield now!" Hook snapped, "He's in no condition to be fighting Autobots!"

"Leader!" Skywarp howled, a dark image of Starscream at his most petulant, "Soundwave needs to die! Right now!"

Having resigned himself to enduring the next few minutes of insanity with his usual grace, Megatron nonetheless had to stare at Skywarp in shock as the black Seeker's words degenerated into the senseless screeching unique to his build. Before this moment, Megatron would have laid credits on Skywarp not even knowing Soundwave's designation. Now the flighty Seeker was demanding his deactivation. What the slag was this fraggotry?

"Lord Megaton: Requesting immediate removal of unit Starscream from area of conflict." The telepath intoned over Skywarp's wrathful vocalizations. Other than the mostly useless attempt to physically barricade a teleporter, Soundwave appeared unruffled. Watching his communications officer, Megatron had the troubling idea that he was missing something from this tableau.

"Idiots!" Megatron snarled, gesturing angrily at the collected soldiers of both armies with his fusion cannon, "Have you completely taken leave of your senses? We're in the middle of battle! Now is not the time to be having petty arguments or asking for vacation time!"

"Starscream is not going into battle!" Hook snapped right back, his glare backed up by both a disapproving Soundwave and a hissing Skywarp.

"This is mutiny!" Megatron snarled, caught off guard by the animosity from those he thought to be among the most loyal of his soldiers.

"Negative. Starscream: Exemption from battle necessitated by medical concerns." Soundwave blithely ignored Megatron's mounting frustration.

"What medical condition!" Megatron raged, optics blazing, "I was unaware that being a traitorous coward was a medical issue!"

"That scrapheap sparked up my winglet!" Skywarp looked more than a little unhinged as his voice rang out over the now silent battlefield. Several members of their impromptu audience stalled in shock, torn between the need to sit down and the pressing desire to find a nice deep hole to hide in.

"I'm going to be a grandmatter!" Thundercracker boasted, finally releasing Starscream to throw himself at Soundwave, "And it's all thanks to you! You wonderful, wonderful mech!"

Megatron stared as Soundwave twitched, flailed in the most discreet manner possible, and through some arcane method that totally ignored the laws of physics, managed to once again put Starscream between himself and the other Seekers. The unusually quiet Air Commander shot an archly amused look at the mech who had been ousted as both his lover and as the creator of his sparkling in front of two armies.

"Starscream!" Megatron growled, well aware that a happy Starscream meant trouble for him and desperate to return reality to its normal course, "Enough of your treason! It's not enough that you have to undermine me at every turn, now you seek to suborn loyal officers into your plots!"

"Why, you sound jealous, Mighty Megatron." Starscream peered up at the Decepticon High Commander in mocking amusement, "I hardly see how my personal relations are any of your business, beyond granting me maternity leave."

Megatron sputtered.

"Before you ask, Lord Megatron, it's all quite legitimate." Hook spoke up with morbid helpfulness from where he had been staying discreetly out of the way of the gesticulating fusion cannon, "The results of my scans make it perfectly clear that Starscream is the creation of Skywarp and Thundercracker, and is now carrying Soundwave's offspring."

"Starscream is their creation?" Megatron asked as he turned and stared at the surgical engineer, completely dumfounded, "Are you sure?"

"Yep." Hook said with nod.

"Soundwave: Was also unaware of Seeker relation." The telepath said mildly as his leader's expression went blank.

In his shock, Megatron was unable to censor himself before he spoke again, "How did that happen?"

Hook paused and stared at the Warlord.

"Well, Megatron." The Constructicon said with a smirk, "When two mechs love each other very, very much…"

END

(Word Count: 1005)

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Note: It kicked my ass for two months, but I finally got over my writers block and managed to get this thing written. I'm… almost happy with it? Meh. It's short and sweet and if fills the request. I just don't think it's the best thing I've ever produced.


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